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"Sascha, it seems to me, the hospital is the best place to start
looking for people who can swear you were no where near L*****e."
John said when Luka finished answering questions about his story to
Philippa. "Even if they evacuated it, some records must still be in
existence that can supply doctors, patients, and other staff names."
John was trying to remain optimistic for Luka's sake.

"I agree." Philippa smiled at Carter's suggestion. "However, I don't
want to put all of our blintzes on the same plate. We will begin with
the hospital, but the search will by no means end there. Finding
people will be extremely difficult. The village of L*****e was an
extreme example of the worst that could happen. Whole towns were
shaken up. Entire neighborhoods disappeared in bombing raids. And
when you factor in 're-settlement'... even with the resources we have
at our disposal, this is not going to be easy."

Luka nodded. "John, my old neighborhood is gone. Of the people whose
names I remember, who knows how many still live there? I left. Many
of them left also. Unlike this country, where most law-abiding folk
have no undue reasons to fear the police or the military, many people
in the three countries involved *do*. Police-issued requests for
information will largely be ignored. Private inquiries...", Luka
sighed as John was about to suggest this. "...must be conducted one-
on-one. If we try to use television, like when you were missing, most
people would assume the government is behind it; figure they've done
enough, sacrificed enough, and turn it off."

"Oh." John's eyes mirrored his disappointment. "Well, the sooner we
get started, the sooner we'll be finished. Is there anything else you
need from me, Philippa?" He was due at work shortly.

"No, John. I'll wind things up with Luka. He'll be able to fill you
in later."

"OK. You're the boss." John gave Luka a quick peck on the cheek. "See
you later this evening." He was at the door when he stopped, returned
to where Luka was sitting, and embraced him. "I love you very much."
John kissed Luka again, on the mouth.

"Thank you, Janaskja. I love you. God willing, I'll see you tonight."
Although Luka's tone was serious, his eyes shone. He slapped John on
the butt. "Get to work, you sentimental menace to my equilibrium."
John winked and was gone.

"What was *that* all about?" Philippa was curious.

"I once told John that back home we got into the habit of making our
good-byes count because we never knew if they would be final ones.
After he was kidnapped, we decided we'd no longer take 'see you
later' for granted."

"I see. Very sensible of you. I'll remember that. Now, what was that
hospital called? Do you remember?" Philippa worked with Luka for
another hour or so, then he left to run errands. It was his week-day
off and by agreement, that meant it was his turn to do the grocery
shopping, laundry, and all the other tasks needed to run a household.

John made it back to County early enough to meet briefly with Dr.
Romano and give him an update on where things stood, prior to going
on duty . The surgeon agreed they had their work cut out for them.

"Are you two doing Ok?" Romano asked in a softer tone than most of
his colleagues would have thought possible.

"So far, so good. As soon as the hearing is scheduled, we'll inform
Dr. Weaver so she can make arrangements to get our shifts covered."
John replied.

"I suppose there is no real reason for both of you to be there..."
Romano observed in a sterner voice. He wanted to see Carter's
reaction to this. He was surprised by the response when it came.

"You're absolutely correct." John smiled. There is no *real* reason
why I should be there. There is however an important reason why I
*will* be there. I'm married to the guy; and what's more, I gave my
word... If Dr. Weaver finds she cannot spare both of us, I'll ask my
father to get a temporary physician to cover my portion of the
affected shifts then take leave without pay. I can promise you,
patient care will not be compromised."

"I don't think it will come to that." Romano grinned. He liked it
when he couldn't bully people.

"Anyway, thanks for your support. By the way, I've been meaning to
ask you. What is that crunchy stuff Gretel likes so much?"

"It depends. I get different varieties. Why?"

"It's delicious." Carter said simply.

"You *ate* my dog's food!?"

"Well, I asked her if I could try some. I was kidding, but she pushed
the bowl over to me. So I had a few pieces to keep from hurting her
feelings. She *was* nice enough to make the offer." John said, never
realizing what this matter-of-fact explanation would mean for his
future. A lifetime of being around horses had left Carter with his
own innate sense of an animal's psyche.

"Ask Shirley for the name of the store. They specialize in organic
pet foods." Romano smiled.

"That really *was* dog food?!" John gulped. "Her bowl said 'muesli
for Gretel'..."

"Yeah, that's what the store calls it. I suppose it sounds more chi-
chi than 'kibble'." Romano laughed at Carter's attempt to keep his
composure and probably the contents of his stomach. "Are you *still*
going to purchase some?"

"Sure, why not? I mean it's organic... I don't think it will kill me.
Gretel looks very healthy." John couldn't wait for next April Fools'
Day. Luka was in for a most unusual breakfast.

"They were right; you'll eat *anything*." Romano laughed again.

"I do have *some* standards, Dr. Romano. Not many, but some." John
grinned and left the office.

Rocket, still chuckling, returned to his paperwork. He had no doubts
about Carter or Kovac. Gretel's ability to smell out rats had never
failed him. Too bad he couldn't convince Human Resources to let her
sit in when they interviewed prospective employees.*

* * * * *

There is an old blues standard featuring the observation that "if it
wasn't for bad luck I wouldn't have no luck at all." Luka was
seriously beginning to consider adopting the song as his personal
theme. He caught a streaming head cold at Easter and had been at home
for two days. John was doing an all-out imitation of Florence
Nightingale; and to top it off, Philippa had called to say she'd
discovered the remaining portion of Mercy Hospital had been bombed
into atoms six days after Luka was released. Dr. Markajic was dead as
was most of its remaining staff.

When John came home from work late that afternoon, Luka was sitting
in the living room with his head in his hands. Used tissues and pages
from a tabloid newspaper were strewn about the floor. The look on his
partner's face stopped whatever John had been about to say. Instead,
he took off his jacket and began to pick up the newsprint sheets.

"John, for God's sake, stop hovering! Just leave it!" Luka snapped.
John put the pages he'd gathered on the coffee table.

"OK, Sascha. You'll tell me what's wrong when you're ready." Ignoring
Luka's mood, John kissed the top of his husband's head and went to
take a bath. He'd already been told the bad news and knew Luka's
outburst was not personal. Smiling to himself, he hung up his suit
jacket and went into the bathroom. When he got there he found Luka
had already started the hot water and was adding apple-scented bath
gel.

"I'm sorry I yelled at you." Luka said quietly. He remembered too
late what his temper could do to someone like John who was vulnerable
to the ill opinion of total strangers, let alone people he knew and
cared about.

"*I'm* not. You just won me two hundred and sixty-five dollars." John
grinned as he shrugged out of his suspenders.

"Excuse me?" Luka thought he must have mis-heard.

"You're excused." John took off his trousers and went to hang them up.

"No, what's this about your winning money?" Luka looked at his
husband whose face was brimming with good humor.

"I thought you'd heard about it. Jerry's been keeping book on when
your halo would fall off and you'd start acting like a human being as
far as I was concerned." John sat on the edge of the tub to remove
his shoes and socks. "I picked the 15th of this month---last week, in
other words. I guess I'm partial to that number." John smiled softly
and put his socks and shirt in the hamper. "Anyway, I win the pot O
cantankerous one. Everybody else's dates have long since passed.

"When did this book start?" Luka was astonished.

"The day you proposed. I guess nobody else figured out how nearly-
perfect you are, except me."

"John, that was over two years ago!"

"See what I mean? You remember anniversaries and everything." John
laughed at the look of complete mystification on Luka's face.
Combined with his reddened nose, he looked like a bewildered rabbit.

"You're kidding."

"Yup. Had you going for a minute there. Now, unless you want me to
pee in the tub, I suggest you take about four steps to one side."

His mouth open, Luka moved out of the way.

"But I yelled at you for no reason..." Luka said loudly over the
sound of two thunderous streams of water.

"No you didn't. You *had* a reason, and I know I'm not it. You
received bad news today. You're worried and upset; not to mention
sick with a cold. Did you expect me to fall apart because you're in a
shitty mood? Listen," John flushed and automatically went to wash his
hands even though he'd be up to his neck in hot soapy water in just a
few minutes. He turned on the cold water and removed his boxers. "I
know the difference between someone saying hurtful things on purpose
and someone who is stressed out *and* out of sorts." John stepped
into the tub. "Like, I said, your halo fell off. Welcome to the human
race, Sascha."

Luka sat on the rim of the bathtub and handed John a washcloth. "I'm
sorry anyway, Janaskja."

John rolled his eyes. "Please, I hope you haven't been walking around
on eggshells for the past three years afraid my poor self-esteem was
going to shrivel up and die at the first sign of criticism. I know it
was pretty frail when you first met me. I'll even admit to being just
a little too enchanted by the view from the pedestal you put me on.
Despite my angst-riddled confession a few weeks ago, or maybe because
of it, I've been waiting for you to yell at me so I could show you
how grown up I am, be smugly magnanimous, *and* make you feel like a
heel." John grinned as he lathered his hair. "Besides, Philippa
called me at work. I know all about the story in the 'Chicago P-I'
and about the hospital."

"Oh." Luka had been too upset over the Post-Intelligencer's lurid
headline story: "Angel of Mercy, or Angel of Death?" to realize their
lawyer would have called John as well.

"It's a lousy picture of you." John smiled then dipped his head under
the water to rinse it. "Let's face it, husband. We knew the press
would get wind of this sooner or later. If your 'unknown admirer' can
send letters to our apartment, surely he or she could figure out how
to get in touch with the media. Philippa was pretty cool about it.
She's already managed to obtain a delay in the proceedings on the
grounds that their entire investigation is leaking from every
orifice. Now why don't you tell me what's really got you so upset?"

"You're wonderful."

"Granted. Come on, Sascha. Tell me your troubles."

"I was feeling lousy enough about all of this, but I never really
focused on the invasion of our privacy. The last time one of us was
in the media, it took months for things to calm down. I felt like I
let you down again." Luka was partially truthful. John's assurances
about his ego to the contrary, how could Luka tell him that deep
down, he sometimes found it hard to cope with John's new-found
emotional serenity.

Without being conciously aware of it, Luka had grown used to being
the person others relied upon. He disliked feeling as if he needed to
be indulged or catered to. John's observation that he'd finally
joined the human race was more accurate than either man realized. Not
since the death of his family, had Luka felt so helpless. Luka sighed
then sneezed.

"Gesundheit. Do you have a cold in your head, or a hole in it?
Listen, Sneezy. For the gazillionth time, I love you like nobody's
business and I don't care who knows. You're an innocent victim in all
of this. I plan to take Tammy Wynette's excellent advice and stand by
my man... or maybe right behind him with my cock up his ass. Either
way, you've got to get a whole lot more rotten to get *my* goat."
John chuckled as he soaped himself.

"Remember, dear heart, I've been yelled at by experts; with Gramps
leading a list that includes Kerry, Peter Benton, Dr. Greene, on
video tape preserved for posterity by the way, *and* the Rocket Man.
In comparison to that crowd of all-stars, you're bush league. Just
you wait until *I* get the head cold from Hell, a medium-sized media
scandal, *and* a husband buzzing around me with a tissue box in one
hand, and a rectal thermometer in the other... I might take a stick
to you. So, why don't you make yourself useful and scrub my back?"

Luka kissed the top of John's wet head and reached for the bath brush.

"Seriously, Sascha." They were finishing dinner. "This newspaper
story may do more good than harm. Nobody came forward when I went
missing until it was on television. Who knows? A surviving staff
member from your hospital may be calling the editor right now to say
you were flat on your back; too sick to go to the bathroom, not to
mention head up a 'death squad'."

"Have you really been waiting for me to get angry with you?" Luka
asked.

"Uh-huh. We've been together for almost four years without a serious
argument." John paused to light his after-dinner cigarette, then
remembered Luka's cold and returned it to his pack. "That's not
natural. Married people fight. If you hadn't yelled at me today, I
would've kept up my over-solicitous care and nursing of your cold
until you *did*." John smiled.

"Thank you, I think." Luka swallowed a few more spoonfuls of his
soup. "Hey, wait a minute. What about *me*?"

"What about you?"

"Have you been sitting on any negative stuff afraid to say anything
to me?"

"Nope. I had the bad luck to fall in love with someone who's perfect,
apart from the odd nauseating nocturnal nosegay." John
snickered. "And you'd already told me about your propensity for
leaving burn marks on the bedding."

"John, I'm serious." Luka was smiling nevertheless.

"So am I. That's the other thing I'm waiting on. Sooner or later, now
that you've become human, you *are* going to do something to piss me
off royally. I've already got a bag packed so I can go home in a huff
to grandmother and wallow in sympathy because my husband refuses to
leave the toilet seat up, or drink from a glass. I figure I'd best
make a mountain out of a molehill because you'll never cheat on me or
belt me in the chops."

"John, if I do *anything* that gets on your nerves please tell me."

"Of course, husband. It's just that so far it hasn't happened."

"I love you." Luka said quietly.

"I know you do. Right back at cha." John got up to clear the table.

Luka went to bed while John cleaned up and had his cigarette. Neither
of them knowing how close to the edge they both were.

Author's Note:
* I always seem to be thanking Invicta for "Hail to the Chief".
Anyway, to find out more about the amazing Gretel, check her story
out (smile). I give it four paws up! KPP
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