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“Yes, Abby. I’m fine.” John said into the phone. He was leaning against Brandon, still in the bed, where the three of them were having a picnic. John smiled as Brandon popped a grape in his mouth. John bit and then sucked on his finger playfully. “Uh, huh. Yes, everything is fine. No, I’m in New York. Yeah, I know. No, it’s beautiful.” He listened, brushing a strand of hair from Veronica’s face. Her head lay on his stomach. “Uh, no, it’s not a patient. Yes, I do know them.” He laughed. “Yes, Abby. I did say them, as in more than one. Really, I’m fine. Just following doctor’s orders. Ok, Abby. I’ll see you when I get back. Yes, Abby. I will. Bye.” He hung up the phone and laid his head back against Brandon’s shoulder.



“Is she your girlfriend?” Veronica stroked his stomach caringly.



“Abby? No. Just a good friend.” He said, running a hand through her hair. “So far, this whole trip has been pretty amazing.” He said, more relaxed physically and mentally than he’d been in years.



“We’ve only just begun, John.” Brandon said, his chest vibrating against John’s back.



“It’s all about fantasy.” Veronica said, stroking his chest.



“It’s about filling a hunger.” Brandon added, his hand joining hers.



“I think it’s about trust.” John said. They all agreed. It was about ultimate trust.



********************

They returned from a late night dinner, dressed in their best suits. Veronica had insisted that they not spend the entire time with John in the bedroom. While out, they went to one of New York's finest restaurants to rebuild their strength. After all, John was a thin man and they still had several days together. She didn't want to run the risk of him expiring on her.



"That was a fantastic idea, my darling." Brandon said, handing John a bottle of water as they sat down.



"I have to agree." John said, sitting on the sofa.



"I just don't want Kerry Weaver to hear how this event didn't include dinner." Veronica said, accepting the glass of wine from Brandon.



"You know Kerry Weaver?" John asked, quite shocked. Hers was the last name on his mind. Veronica giggled.



"We went to college together. Roommates. When Brandon and I learned she was your supervisor, I decided to get in touch with her again." She sat next to John. "I'm amazed she's not married. She told me you used to rent her basement from her." She smiled.



"Dr. Weaver is married to her career." John said. "Yeah, I lived with her for almost a year. I'll never forget what it feels like to wake up out of a dead sleep to Grace Jones at full blast. She's a great cook, though." He said. "And a good boss. Does she know it was you who bid on me?" He asked, remembering that Kerry was the first one to tell him he'd be safe on this trip. Kerry knew whom he was with and probably what he was doing. Veronica laughed, seeing the emotions run over John's face.



"We planned it for months." Veronica giggled.



"Does Kerry know, well, you know, what you had planned?" He asked.



"She knows enough. Kerry was wild in her days also. I could tell you some stories." Veronica joked. John scrunched up his face.



"Uh, no thanks. I mean, I love Kerry but she is, after all my boss. If I hear too many details, I'll never be able to look her in the eyes again." He laughed.



"Well, if you're worried about her having a problem with what you do in your spare time, just let her know that you know all about the tiquella and the boys from Harvard." She winked. John laughed.



"So, Veronica, dear. What do you have on the agenda for tonight?" Brandon asked. She looked at John with wicked eyes.



"Uh, oh." John teased.



"Well, John darling. Brandon and I had discussed this before your arrival. We truly do have some events planned out for you however you have full right to refuse or alter any of the details for your own comfort, all right?" She explained.



"Sure. Fantasy, hunger, and trust. Got it." He stated letting him know that he was game for just about anything. Brandon smiled. Veronica cleared her throat.



"All right. Well, this afternoon was a surprise for all of us, I believe so it doesn't count."



"It did for me." John assured, bobbing his head.



"Well, that being said, tonight is just for us to get to know each other." She described. "Tomorrow night is for Brandon and myself and your last night here will belong to you. If you chose not to stay the entire time, that is perfectly acceptable. If you do decide to stay, we did promise to have you returned for your shift Thursday evening."



"Well, considering tonight is Monday, I'd say so far, so good. I'm planning on staying as long as I can if things keep this good." He smiled. Brandon and Veronica also smiled.



"Wonderful. Now, because someone else gets to make the rules, Brandon and I figured that we needed to create a word that you can use at any time when you experience something that you don't like."



"Or can't handle." Brandon added. John nodded.



"Now, since we have already discovered that you have total control over your vocal capabilities when you are in the heat of the moment," She teased.



"I'm not sure how much control I had over all that screaming but ok, if you think I do, I do." John laughed.



"If at any time things get out of control, any of us can use the word 'RED'. For whatever reason. If any of us hears someone say that word, we all agree to stop immediately and make sure everyone is all right, agreed?" She asked. Both men nodded. "Good. John, do you have any rules that we should know about. For example, I will not let Brandon have anal intercourse with me. The same goes for you. I've never liked it so I don't get anything out of it. Condoms need to be used during intercourse however it is a choice during oral sex. Both Brandon and I have been tested regularly and I certainly hope you have." She asked.



"I'm clear." He stated.



"Brandon is pretty open to just about anything." She said.



"Typical guy." John shot towards him, playfully.



"So, do you have any rules regarding you that we should know about?" She asked. John thought for a moment.



"Knives. I don't like knives. And the dark. And probably not a good idea to sneak up behind me." John said, thinking briefly on his attack. Brandon had already told Veronica that John had typical symptoms of a person with Post Traumatic Stress Disorder so they had already spoken about avoiding anything that might remind him of the attack



"So you'd be open to being tied up?" She asked. John blushed.



"Uh, yeah." He said.



"Blindfolds?" She asked. He instantly shook his head.



"No. I won't know where you are. No, no blindfolds." He stated. Brandon could see a change in John's face.



"It's ok, John. You can say no to anything." Brandon reassured.



"It's better we talk about these things before someone does something that makes one of us uncomfortable, right?" Veronica said, seeing the look on John's face. He sighed.



"Well, it sure isn't doing anything for my mood." John admitted. He'd been so relaxed and happy but out of nowhere, the depression threatened to over come him as soon as he thought of the attack.



John hadn't thought of many of the things that Veronica was talking about. In the past, sex had always been spontaneous. Most of his past partners had been simple, not getting outrageously creative but the sex had still been good. Sure, Roxanne had been more creative than the rest but with her, it had been just anal penetration with her finger and light bondage, both occasionally tying the other up to the bedpost. Never anything really tricky or dangerous.



What he'd already experienced today had already topped John's list for creativity. Anal sex was far greater than he'd imagined and he hoped to get an opportunity to see if Brandon would let John enter him. Having Veronica straddle him had been something he'd never imagined while he was being penetrated at the same time and he was hoping to repeat the experience. He wanted to try oral sex with a man but was scared. He wanted to take Veronica in the Jacuzzi. For John, it was much more about the person he was with rather than the act itself. He never had the naughty boy, mean teacher fantasies many of his friends talked about. John got himself worked up enough in his own mind without the need for make believe.



"John?" Brandon asked, bringing him out of his head. "You're thinking too much." He smiled. Veronica stood up and set her wine glass down.



"I have an idea. John, would you like a massage?" She asked, holding out a hand for him to take. John's mind was still far away, analyzing, breaking thoughts down, and analyzing again. He looked at her with a far away stare. She smiled, beckoning him to follow her. John stood as Veronica and Brandon exchanged glances. John was gone mentally and they'd need to bring him back carefully.



John had explained to Brandon while in Atlanta that he had developed this coping mechanism back when his brother became sick for when things got to be too much. He could check out mentally at the drop of a pin, still be aware of his surroundings, and function normally but mentally he'd be protected. He could leave himself and only come back when he could feel in control. In fact, he used it often at work, helping him to deal with the horrors he saw every day. He would go into memory mode, assisting his patients and dealing with the situation as he would normally but he was going on autopilot. Most people who knew him or worked with him on a daily basis never even knew he used this method but John had found it helped keep him unaffected. Both Veronica and Brandon could tell that John had checked out.



They went upstairs to the master bedroom and Brandon helped John undress and crawl into bed. Veronica was in the bathroom, gathering massage oils when Brandon joined her.



"Don't bother. He's out." He smiled. He'd seen John fade out before but this had sort of surprised him. John had explained that he'd done this once or twice while growing up, gone way too far but Brandon hadn't believed or truly understood what John had been talking about until that moment. It seemed to have taken so little to send his mind away.



"Maybe he's still having trouble adjusting. Maybe he's not as healed as he wanted us to believe." She said, looking at John's sleeping figure in the bed.



"I think you're right." Brandon agreed. "I just hope we get the John Carter that was here earlier back when he wakes up." He hugged his wife.



They both undressed and crawled into bed, one on either side of him. Even in his sleep, John's body searched out their warmth and he pulled them both closer. Finally, all three slept.



********************

A very short time later, John woke with a jerk. He sat upright, shaking as he tried to remember where he was. Veronica sat up, gently touching his back. His skin was ice cold and covered in sweat. His whole body was trembling.



"John, are you ok?" She whispered, not wanting to wake Brandon. John looked at her with a glassy stare. Soon, his eyes returned to normal and he looked at her.



"Yeah, I'm fine." He said, smiling sheepishly at the naked blonde next to him. She held out her arms and he melted into her. She began kissing his forehead, wiping the sweat from his brow, warming his body with her own. He began to respond, kissing her chin, her neck and soon desire took over.



Their mouths met as John's hands found her breasts. He began to make love to her body, kissing, licking, pleasing every inch, and worshipping every pore. His mouth and hands were everywhere, adulating her body. Veronica couldn't help but to moan and feel envious of every woman that John had ever been with. He certainly knew what he was doing.



John kissed his way down her breasts, to her stomach, down to her thighs. Veronica spread her legs for him, allowing him access to her most private areas. He parted her lips and began using his mouth to bring her pleasure.



Brandon watched John make love to his wife with such energy and talent that he was slightly jealous. Veronica's eyes were closed and a look of rapture was on her face, totally involved only in the feeling.



John smiled as he moved up her body, kissing her breasts on his way. Brandon reached for one of the condoms. He tapped on John's shoulder, getting his attention.



"Here, sit up." Brandon said as John did as he was told. Brandon smiled as he looked at John's body, fully aroused. Brandon bent down and took the head into his mouth causing John to buck up slightly.



"Oh." John moaned as he was engulfed by Brandon's hot mouth. Brandon took his full length into his mouth and throat. He nibbled his way back towards the tip and he kissed it passionately. Finally, he placed the condom over John's errection. Veronica reached out for John as he again directed his attentions to the blonde writhing under him. Brandon helped guide John into his wife as John took over. This was nothing he needed help with. Making love to a beautiful woman was something he knew how to do quite well.



John placed his head onto Veronica's shoulder, trying to delay his climax but was losing the battle. Luckily, Veronica's breathing increased as her orgasm neared, giving John permission to release. They both began gasping for air as their climaxes raced to the surface. Veronica's back arched, causing John to groan loudly as his climax crashed through his entire body.



John collapsed on Veronica's body. They kissed softly, both expended but happy. After several moments, John rolled over onto is side, breaking the physical contact.



"Glad to see you back with us." Brandon smiled, kissing John's shoulder. John laughed to himself.



"Thanks." He smiled. Veronica rolled over, her arm draped over John's stomach.



"That was pretty impressive, John Carter. I'd love to see if you were up for a repeat performance but that wiped me out. I think I'm going to get some sleep." John reached over and kissed her sleepy eyes.



"Good night." John crawled out of the bed, trying not to disturb her too much.



"Hey, where you going?" Brandon asked.



"I never sleep for more than a few hours at a time. I think I'm going to take a shower if you don't mind?" John stood at the end of the bed.



"Can I join you?" Brandon asked. John held out his hand and smiled. Brandon followed him.



"Are you limping?" Brandon asked as he set the water temperature. He noticed it when they walked to the bathroom.



"A bit." John admitted, his back actually in a lot of pain. "It's kind of had a workout the past 12 hours let alone the 17 hour shift I pulled yesterday." He laughed. Brandon stood at the door, offering John to climb in the shower first, which he did.



"Well, we'll see if we can give you a rest today. I can call the masseuse. Have the masseuse come out and give you the full treatment." Brandon offered. John stood under the water, directing the pulsating streams to his lower back while turning the temperature to an almost scalding temperature.



"This usually works." He stood there, obviously in pain both from the muscles and the temperature. He needed the heat to relax his spasms and take away the pain.



"You do realize that you can get third degree burns from scalding water, don't you doctor?" Brandon asked, thankful that he was on the opposite side where he couldn't feel the water. John bent over, his hands on his knees, finally able to do so, trying to stretch the muscles. John laughed.



"I'll be fine." He said. Brandon was worried about John, particularly what he'd seen this evening.



"How many nights a week do you still have nightmares?" He asked. John looked up at him, surprised. He smiled, knowing that Brandon knew.



"The true question here is how many nightmares do I have a night. It's gotten better. Usually only one or two but it's still every night. I'm getting used to them." John smiled, lowering the water temperature and motioning that he wanted Brandon to join him, which he did.



"Still seeing a therapist?" Brandon asked, soaping John's chest.



"My life has been really crazy lately. Did I tell you that the guy who stabbed me was a patient in the hospital a few weeks ago?" John took the soap and began to wash Brandon's shoulders and chest.



"No, you didn't. Were you his doctor?" He asked. John laughed.



"No, but another doctor that I was dating at the time was. Abby tried to keep me from seeing him but I just had to hear his voice, you know. The entire thing flashed through my head in fast motion, over and over. He told me he was sorry but that he had a disease but he was better now." John admitted, closing his eyes as Brandon caressed his back.



"How's your family?" Brandon tried to change the subject. He felt John's body weaken under his hand. He realized that John was crying. Brandon pulled him to his body and held him closely. "My god, John. You're a mess." He whispered, gently kissing John's head. John laughed again to himself.



"I thought this was about forgetting." He said, almost innocently. "Brandon, help me forget, even if it's just for a few days." He begged. Brandon kissed him gently on the lips.



"First, sleep. Let me hold you while you sleep. We'll get you a massage tomorrow and maybe a swim?" He suggested. John nodded against his chest. Brandon turned off the water and wrapped John's body up with a fluffy white towel. John looked so young and innocent yet tired and old at the same time.



They dried themselves off and Brandon tucked John back into bed, wrapping his body safely around John's, memories of their first night together in both their minds. Brandon kissed his head gently until John fell asleep.
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