13-Damage is Done
A couple of days after their visit with Abby, the guys were relaxing in the living room. Dave had seen how stressed John seemed to be getting, trying to watch after his grandmother, dealing with the home health agency and the nurses that showed up when they wanted to and to have his mother back in the house, wanting to become a part of his life. Dave also knew his parent's divorce was still on John's mind as well as trying to continue their relationship and be a 'daddy' to Maura. Then Dave went and tried to convince him to have a threesome with the one female who held a piece of John's heart. Dave knew it was time they sat down and had a talk about what had happened.
"John, you do know the only reason that I went along with Abby was because I know how much you've wanted her." Dave explained.
"I know, it's just that a year ago, I wouldn't have even hesitated. But now, I'm just not sure if what Abby proposed was such a good idea. I still care about her, but I'm afraid of losing her as a friend. It's been strained enough and I don't want to risk making things worse." John clarified.
"Listen, John, I know how you feel, but if Abby brings it up again…" Dave paused, "well, just think about it, I mean you should just take things as they come." Dave sat on the couch while John lay with his head in Dave's lap.
"I have to admit, though, I felt a bit jealous at seeing her so eagerly and willingly kissing you." John admitted. "It sort of scared me though because I was completely turned on by it." John blushed as Dave laughed.
"I was rather disappointed that you didn't want to take her up on her offer, you know it's not the first time that I have fantasized about watching you and Abby." Dave confessed as he ran his fingers through John's hair.
John stared away from Dave for a moment. He needed to change the subject.
"Hey, Baby, there was something else we should talk about. What would you say if I was ready to let people know about my preferences, you know? Dave, I'm not quite ready to tell the world but I think it would have been nice if I could have gone to say, Kerry, and talked to her after her girlfriend 'outed' her without her permission," John confided.
"Maybe we should have a comin' out party," Dave teased. "We could invite Kerry and her girlfriend. You know I had a feeling that she was a dyke when Dr. Legaspi was hanging around."
John furrowed his brow towards Dave, but decided to ignore his crude remark. "Oh, you'd like that wouldn't you?" John laughed knowing how much Dave had gotten a thrill out of watching two women making out.
"You really wanna tell the Chief?" Dave asked; a bit surprised that John was willing to 'come out'.
"I just don't want to hide it from my close friends, I'd rather them hear it first hand than have someone slip and say something unexpectedly. Besides, you know most of them so this involves you, too." John said
"I don't have a problem with that. You know it's sort of funny really 'cause since I've never tried to pick up on any of the chicks over at Northwestern, I've already heard rumors that some of the nurses are taking bets that I'm gay." He confided in John.
"I better never hear of you trying to pick up the nurses at Northwestern." John scolded, nuzzling against Dave's stomach.
"Nope. Those days are long over, Hoss. You're all I need."
~~~~~~~~
It had not taken John long to realize that Eleanor's drinking was not a one time occurrence but rather a daily affair. He had tried talking with her and had even invited her to join him at an AA meeting. At the very least he had warned her of the dangers of mixing alcohol with Xanax. Denial was a funny thing. He wondered what it was going to take before she realized that she had a problem. Thinking back he knew that his own drug abuse had nearly cost him his career.
~~~~~~~~~
Dave was on call. He was paged at 3:00 a.m. to come in for an early shift. He was long gone before John had to get up. John had forgotten to set his alarm and ended up over sleeping. He was running late when he arrived for work. He made a beeline for the admit desk to check in, and of course, there stood Kerry.
"Sorry, I'm a bit late, over slept," he explained slightly out of breath from the dead run into the building from the parking garage. He signed in, grabbed a couple charts and headed for the lounge.
"Just hurry up and start seeing patients John, it's too early to be backed up already!" she warned him.
He quickly put his coat and bag away, donned his lab coat, and grabbed a cup of coffee.
Aside from being late, John's morning was fairly routine. He was finishing up with his first couple of patients when he passed by the admit desk to erase his name from the board and pick up a new chart. He grabbed the chart and turned away quickly when he heard Frank and Kerry.
"So you're gay?" Frank asked as Kerry had just finished an argument with Romano.
"Yes, Frank, I'm gay, alright," she stated testily. She wasn't in the best of moods and Frank was the last person she wanted to discuss her sexuality with.
"You know you're going to hell, right?" Frank stated.
John saw Kerry standing there, looking as if she wanted to belt him. He wouldn't have blamed her if she did. He had to hand it to Kerry though; he knew how hard it was to admit to his friends that he was bisexual. He had wanted to tell Kerry but somehow he just couldn't bring himself to do it. As he walked away with his chart, his stomach began to rumble reminding him that he still had not eaten breakfast.
Taking the elevator upstairs to the cafeteria, he was just about to get something to eat when his pager went off.
He grabbed a banana and a carton of milk and tossed a couple of bucks to the hostess. "Gotta run," he said as he quickly opened the milk and downed about half of it. On the elevator he ran into Susan.
"Hey, John, how are you?" She smiled, noting that he seemed a bit distracted.
He just shrugged, indicating that his mouth was full. He downed the rest of his milk and tossed the empty carton into the trash.
"It's my mother," he stated as he began telling Susan about his recent experiences with his mom's drinking and drug abuse.
"An entire bottle of wine?" She asked as they exited the elevator.
"Topped off with a couple of Xanax," he said as he took another bite.
"Oh, was she embarrassed?" Susan asked as she followed him towards to admit desk.
"Hard not to be when you're puking your guts out." He finished the rest of his banana. "You know what the worst part of it was?" He playfully asked as he tossed the peel into a nearby trash bin.
"That you had to put her to bed?" Susan offered to fill in the blank.
"It was a 40-year-old bottle of Bordeaux," he smirked.
"Is this a new thing?" Susan asked.
"Apparently, she has been taking them on and off for years," he answered as he walked away to find out who had paged him.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~
John was busy with a patient when Abby informed him that his mother had brought in a young cancer patient from the center were she had been doing some volunteer work. Abby handed him a chart that she had started on the boy.
Eleanor had insisted that he personally look after Mickey.
"Mickey, how you doing?" He approached Mickey with a smile. He was a bit reluctant to help with Mickey's care because he couldn't understand why his mother was acting as if she really cared, acting like this boy's . . mother? The thought made him shudder. And why did she insist he be involved?
He knew that his mother still hadn't come to term with her own son's death from the horrible disease...he just hoped her motives were pure, and not some kind of sick need to bring Bobby back through another child's misfortune.
"Not so good," he answered, the young boy's voice clearly indicated that he wasn't feeling well.
"Well," John put on his friendliest doctor face, "we're going to see if we can't figure out a way to make you feel a little better." John felt the boy's forehead and again checked his chart.
"A private room would help," Eleanor quietly implored. John ignored her and continued with his examination.
"Swing your legs up here for me," John kept his attention focused on the patient as he helped Mickey to lie back on the gurney.
After a thorough examination and Abby's help, John ordered some tests.
"My best friend, Eddie, has the flu," Mickey said as Abby began setting up to for a blood draw.
"Yeah, there's a lot of that going around," John replied as he got up to make room for Abby to work.
"They were shooting outside," Eleanor informed him that the center was taking pictures of Mickey.
"It's freezing." Abby remarked.
"Yeah, I know, I tried to tell the photographer that, but he wouldn't listen." Eleanor added.
"Abby here is going to draw some of your blood," John informed Mickey.
"I have a good vein here," Mickey pointed out to Abby, he had been through this enough to know what to expect. John busied himself with the chart, a lump welling up in his throat. This kid was so much like his brother. Mickey knew the drill. He was also alone, so much like Bobby had been. Sure, Bobby had parents and siblings, but ultimately, he was alone. Eleanor couldn't deal with Bobby's illness and his father, well, he found reasons to stay away.
"Take a deep breath and exhale," Abby spoke softly as she prepared the area.
John had occupied himself with jotting notes on the chart and hadn't noticed his mother's reluctance to watch the procedure.
"You don't have to watch," Mickey assured her.
"I'm fine," Eleanor protested. John just looked puzzled and decided he just couldn't watch his mother with this boy. He was barely able to keep his own emotions at bay and he decided he couldn't take any more of this.
"Just a couple more vials and we'll be all done," Abby reassured him.
John was thankful that Abby was the nurse and he knew she'd take care of this very sick, scared boy. He set the chart down next to where Abby was working and turned to leave.
"Where are you going?" Eleanor asked as she watched John walk away.
"I have other patients," he informed her, seriously needing the physical separation.
~~~~~~~~~~
John listened in on an argument between Kerry and Deb at the admit desk regarding an antibiotic Deb had ordered for a patient. Dr. Chen argued that she didn't need her advice and that her recommendation was perfectly acceptable. John was pulled into the middle of their argument and had offered his opinion in defense of Kerry.
"Thanks a lot." Deb sneered at him, as Kerry walked away.
"What did I do?" He challenged, feigning innocence.
"Let her off the hook. Whose side are you on anyways?" Deb stated rather indignant.
"Oh, I'm not on anybody's side. I'm trying to play this very neutral." John smiled innocently.
"No, no, you have to be on someone's side, and it better be on mine." Deb bantered with him, trying to sound seriously wounded that he sided with Weaver. She poked him in the arm as he turned away from her.
"Deb, she's my boss." He came back at her indignantly as he pulled his arm out of her reach.
"You like her, don't you?" Deb teased.
"I don't dislike her." He stated, matter-of-factly.
"Huh, that makes a lot of sense." She continued to harass him.
"What makes a lot of sense?" He couldn't figure out what she was talking about.
"Your taste," she snickered.
"Excuse me?" He was still rather confused at what she was hinting at.
"John, it's obvious. You have a thing for older woman," she insinuated.
"What?" John questioned, getting really offended with her assessment of him.
"Yeah, Weaver, Lewis, that pediatric surgeon, what was her name?" She continued to make fun of his choices of women.
"Oh, come on." He looked around to make sure no one was listening. He was a bit embarrassed that she even knew about Abby Keaton.
"Come on, younger women just too much for you?" She was just having way too much fun.
"Oh no, I can handle myself either way." He declared in his own defense. If only she knew what either way really meant, he thought, chuckling silently.
"Oh, sure you can," she laughed mischievously.
Just at that moment Chuni walked up to the desk. "Carter, your mom's asking for you. What do you want me to tell her?" John looked up, hoping for some way out, some way to avoid having to deal with his mother and her sudden urge to be a concerned 'parent'.
"You can tell her I'm with a patient." He answered, thankful as a trauma came through the doors. He ran to meet the incoming paramedic.
~~~~~~~~~~
After John finished up with his trauma patient, he decided that his avoidance of his mother just wasn't fair to Mickey. He seemed like such a nice kid and a smart one, too. Mickey knew he was dying. He went to check on Mickey
"I'm sorry, I got busy there." John informed Eleanor as he checked over the chart again just to make it look like he was doing something. He explained that he had called pedes oncology. Mickey was going to be admitted and he would be sent upstairs to his room very soon.
"Aren't you going to do something?" Eleanor asked
"Yeah, I sent off his labs," he answered, understanding what she was asking. His mother figured that since her son, the one that no one in his family had ever supported in his career decision, was a doctor, that she and the child she brought in would receive immediate service. John knew his mother was not used to dealing with 'County' hospitals.
"No, I mean in terms of treating him," Eleanor insisted.
"There's no obvious infection so oncology can take it from here," John informed her as he began to walk away again.
"Oh." Eleanor sighed, disappointed that John didn't show more interest in Mickey.
"It may be a while, if you want to go home," John stated. He still wondered why she was so concerned with this child's care.
"I can't leave." Eleanor stated dryly.
"Are you sure that you want to do this, stay involved?" John asked. He glared at her for a moment, shocked and yes, even a bit sickened by this sudden show of compassion. Eleanor was not someone who had shown much of it in her life towards anyone.
~~~~~~~~~~
Later, John and Susan were talking at the admit desk. They had heard that Elizabeth had brought Ella in after she had gotten into Rachel's stash of ecstasy.
"It's amazing the drugs these kids can get a hold of," Susan remarked. She was just about to go check on a patient when she saw a familiar face coming through the door. "Oh, my, God, is that Rachel?" She turned and asked John as she saw Rachel solemnly walk into the ER.
"Yeah," he confirmed, nodding his head. He figured this was as good a time as any to take a quick break. On his way to the lounge, his mother appeared out of nowhere.
Eleanor informed him that a doctor had still not seen the boy. She then tried to enlist John's help to do something for him.
"I was just going to get some coffee. Would you like some?" John asked, wishing his pager would go off about then. He needed a distraction or maybe talk to Dave. Yes, he needed to just hear Dave's voice.
Eleanor was hot on his heels as she followed him into the lounge and abruptly handed him some papers. John took one look and realized she had stolen the lab results from Mickey's chart. He took them from her and asked her why she had them. She reasoned that no one had looked at them yet and she was hoping he would. John glanced over the charts quickly and informed Eleanor that Mickey is in blast crisis and his leukemia had returned. Eleanor continued to insist that he do something to help Mickey. He tried to explain that he was sure they were giving Mickey antibiotics and that the Oncologist would know what to do, but Eleanor persisted.
"Why are you doing this?" He had finally reached a breaking point with her act. "I mean, you've been here all day, you've been holding his hand, clipping his chart, bugging the staff." John's mind was flooded with distain for the fact that he perceived his mother to care more about this total stranger than she ever cared for Bobby or for him.
"I'm trying to help a sick child," Eleanor responded casually.
"Mom, he has leukemia." He stated clearly. Maybe she would get this through her head. "He may not survive." He continued. "Look, if you have some kind of twisted need to relive this, that's fine, I'm not going to do it again. I made my peace a long time ago." He had no desire to be dragged into the situation. It was too late to make up for the guilt she felt for neglecting her dying son, much less the surviving children. It was not his fault that Bobby had died. It was no ones fault, but in the end, he had been the one to pay the price. His mother had all but forgotten that he even existed and now she was demanding his help to do… what? 'Save' Mickey, he was sick, no he was dying, and there was nothing that he, or anyone else could do to stop it. Miracles did happen, of that he had no doubt, but reality is the best way to handle this, and his mother did not have a good grasp on reality right now, in his opinion. He just didn't want to see this kid suffer any more than he already had because his Mom needed to do this again, and this time, be there for the child instead of running away.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Eleanor finally left, looking hurt at John's cutting remarks, insisting that she was going to go back and sit with Mickey.
John sank deeply into the well-worn couch in the lounge. He held the receiver of the phone under his chin, listening to the ringing on the other end.
"Uh, yes, is Dr. Malucci there?" John asked the female voice that had answered the phone. "Yeah, I can hold," he sighed wearily.
"Dr. Malucci, here." Dave answered not knowing who would be calling him at work.
"Hey, Baby, " John replied wearily. He really needed to just hear Dave's voice after dealing with his mother.
"What's up? John, are you okay?" Dave asked, suddenly becoming concerned at the tone of John's voice.
"Yeah, I just needed to talk to you for a minute. I'm having a hell of a day. You know what the topper has been? My mom brought in a kid from that cancer center that she's been volunteering at and would you believe that she suddenly wants to become a parent?" He said sarcastically. Dave laughed softly.
"Maybe seeing us with Maura has brought out those maternal instincts in her." Dave offered.
"Maternal instincts? Dave, this is my mother we're talking about here." John snickered.
"Yeah, I guess you're right. So, what else has gone wrong with your day?" Dave tried to get the subject off his mother.
"Oh, let's see, I watched Frank tell Kerry she was going to hell for being gay and Deb accused me of having a thing for older women. I made the mistake and took Kerry's side instead of hers during an argument I got yanked into, for starters."
"Man, you have had a hard day. Is there anything I can do for you?" Dave offered knowing that John just needed to vent his frustrations.
"You already did." John sighed. He already felt better. "I just needed to let off a little steam. Actually, I need to get back to work." John shrugged. "So, I should be home by seven."
"You sure you're okay?" Dave asked again, giving John a chance to continue if he needed to.
"Yeah, I'm fine. I'll see you later. I love you." John added, before saying good-bye.
"I love you too," Dave replied before hanging up the phone.
~~~~~~~~
A little after noon, Deb approached John at the front desk again. "Hey, Carter, let's go get a bite to eat before the board fills up again."
"Okay, let me go grab my coat." He headed towards the lounge as she followed him.
"So things are really heating up between you and Lewis?" She asked, fishing for information. She had apparently been listening to the nurse's rumors.
"Susan is just a friend," he clarified.
"Really?"
"Yes, Deb, really. Now would you just drop it, please?" If it wasn't for the fact that he had missed breakfast and only had a banana earlier, he might have changed his mind about going to lunch with Deb. He just hoped that this wasn't the only reason she suggested they have lunch together.
Together they made their way across the street to Doc Magoo's. By the time they got there, their cheeks were frozen, their hands were going numb and their ears were turning red from the icy wind.
"Damn, it's cold out there." John coughed as he breathed out the frozen air. He could see his breath as he tried to warm up his hands by breathing into them.
They quickly found a booth as far away from the door as they could get and sat down. The waitress was right behind them with menus and Deb immediately ordered a large hot chocolate, still shivering from the cold.
"That sounds really good, I'll have one, too." John ordered as he began looking over the menu, thinking that he wanted something hot.
"So, John, why aren't you dating anyone?" She asked curiously.
"Who says I'm not?" He answered quizzically. Yes, this was the only reason she'd invited him to lunch.
Before she got a chance to reply, the waitress came over to take their orders.
"Seriously, I don't mean to be so nosy but if Susan and Abby are just your friends and there's me and apparently Kerry." She smiled sheepishly as she noticed his discomfort.
"I could ask the same of you. Why are you so interested in my social life all of the sudden?"
"I just thought that maybe we could go out to dinner some night, like a real date perhaps?" Deb smiled as she waited for his response.
"To tell you the truth, I'm really not interested in dating." He was getting the feeling that he was getting in to deep not to tell Deb about Dave.
"You should give it some thought." Deb persisted, looking up from her cup.
"Deb, if I didn't know better I would think that you were trying to ask me out," John smiled teasingly.
"Maybe I am," she grinned mischievously, making him blush.
"Deb, you didn't seem to hear me when I said I'm not in the market."
"So does that mean that you're turning me down?" She pouted playfully.
"Yes, Deb, because I'm taken. I have someone in my life right now and have for quite some time, so you can stop worrying about me being some lonely bachelor." He hadn't meant to sound so blunt and was thankful for the temporary interruption as the waitress brought their food.
"Right, that's why we have never seen this elusive woman of yours." She was not completely convinced that he was telling her the entire truth.
"What? I can't have a life outside this hospital? Does it ever occur to anyone around here that maybe I would prefer to keep my personal life private?" He was really beginning to sound a bit agitated as he dug into his food.
"Jeez, John, I didn't mean to upset you. It's just that I have been thinking about it lately and I thought that if I was ever going to even get a chance, than I would have to be the first one to make a move. But if you already have someone, then I guess I really don't stand a chance." She smiled cheerfully as she searched his face for any hint of a reply. "So, does this mean that I'm never going to get to meet this person who seems to have you tied down?" She continued to taunt him.
"Actually you already have, Deb." John decided that if he was ever going to put an end to her persistent pestering he was going to have to tell her the truth.
She sat back for a minute, trying to think of who on earth she had seen him with. She couldn't think of anyone that they hadn't already mentioned. "And this special someone doesn't work here?" She asked puzzled. She suddenly thought of someone from the past, he had said, 'for quite some time now.'
"Please tell me it's not that Rena chick you went out with last year is it?"
"No, listen Deb, you'd never guess in a million years, so there's no point in trying. If you promise that you'll keep it to yourself, I'll tell you. But you have to swear." He urged seriously.
"Fine, cross my heart, I won't tell a soul." She drew an X across her chest and held up her other hand. "And my fingers aren't even crossed. I promise to keep your secret." She held her glass of water to her lips about to take a drink.
"Okay, but put the water down first, I don't want it all over me." He bantered as he leaned forward and gestured for her to lean closer. He took a quick look around the room and leaned closer to her as he whispered. "It's Dave, Deb, I'm bisexual." He showed her the ring. "We're married." He calmly admitted.
"I don't believe you, you're such a liar." She laughed out loud, "Boy you almost had me with that one!" She stopped laughing when she saw the serious expression on his face.
He looked really wounded by her lack of sensitivity. John thought maybe she'd be surprised but he didn't expect to be laughed at, particularly from Deb of all people. She had no idea how hard it was for him to even tell her. He'd been there for her how many times and she laughed at him?
With the day he'd been having, this rubbed him completely wrong. He felt hurt, tired, angry and exposed. He had decided to finally share something in his life that made him so happy and she sat there, laughing, basically calling him a liar! He pulled out his wallet and threw a couple of bills on the table, snatched his coat and quickly walked out, not bothering to say good-bye or even look back. He didn't think that this was going to be a piece of cake but he hadn't expected her to laugh at him or call him a liar. He really didn't know what to expect, but not this.
Sitting back against her seat, she watched as he walked up the street toward the convenience store on the corner. She waited for a while, figuring he would calm down and come back. After a while, she figured that he obviously wasn't coming back. Deb bundled up, and went after him.
She found him easily. He was leaning against the wall next to the front steps of the hospital with a cigarette cupped in his hand. She watched as he inhaled deeply and blew out a gust of smoke, watching it drift off into the cold wind.
It had been a while since he had craved the euphoric high of the narcotic painkillers that he had used to dull the pain after his attack. Nicotine was a poor substitute, but it helped to calm his shattered nerves. Between dealing with his mother and Deb's remarks, he just needed some time alone.
When he saw Deb approach, he threw his cigarette to the ground. He really didn't want to talk to her right now. He walked up the steps and into the hospital, his long strides taking him swiftly away from her.
Running to catch up with him she called out. "John, I'm sorry, I didn't mean to…" She stopped when she saw him turn towards her. She smiled softly, embarrassed. She felt awful that she had been so insensitive. She had practically forced him to tell her, and then she laughed...how was she supposed to know though? She had never seen him with a guy, only pretty blondes...what did he really expect as a reaction from her? His look was one of pure hurt, which made Deb feel even worse. How could she have laughed? She could kick herself for being such an insensitive jerk.
"Deb, would you just leave me alone for a while? I've had a really rough day, and I just cannot handle another problem." His words were cutting, and he regretted the curt remark as soon as it came out of his mouth. He just couldn't spend one more minute with her looking at him with such pity. He figured he was being overly sensitive, but Deb had been completely insensitive and he just couldn't deal with her right now.
~~~~~~~~
Before his shift ended, he had went up to oncology to check on his mother. She had fallen asleep in a chair at Mickey's bedside, and John found himself talking to Mickey.
"She's tired." Mickey announced politely. John watched his mother sleeping for several minutes, wondering what she dreamt about. Since Mickey was staring at him, John decided he should spend some time getting to know this boy who had gotten to his mother's heart. He sat at Mickey's bedside and asked him if he knew what was happening to him. Mickey said that he knew that the cancer was back, but that it would be better this time. Mickey looked over at Eleanor. "I was by myself before," he said.
John suddenly seemed to understand why his mother had become so taken by this boy. This was her one opportunity to try and make up for all the wrongs she'd done to Bobby, and Mickey obviously needed someone to care. He was a really sweet kid who was dying.
~~~~~~~~
He signed out for the day and gathered his belongings to leave. On his way out he nearly ran into Abby standing under the overhang outside the double doors of the ambulance bay, smoking a cigarette.
"I didn't see you standing there, I'm sorry," he apologized. It had started snowing and he had been trying to wrap his scarf around him. He'd figured out a way to hopefully make himself feel better and he had to hurry if he was going to make it.
"John, how's it going?" She asked, shivering a bit. "Are you okay? You seem a little distracted." She observed as she took another drag.
"Yeah, I'm fine, just really tired." Seeing the expression of disbelief on her face he sighed, "Okay, I'm not fine, but I will be as soon as I get out of here. I'm on my way to a NA meeting." He had already reached into his pocket and pulled out the newly purchased pack of cigarettes and began to light one.
"I'm planning on going to an AA meeting after my shift, want to come back, pick me up and go together?" She offered as she noticed him smoking.
"No, I don't think so, I sort of need this right now, besides Dave has to go back to work later tonight, I want to get home so I can spend some time with him before his shift." John readjusted his scarf before leaving.
"Maybe some other time. I'm getting out of here before I get sucked back into working." Indicating the in coming ambulance.
An ambulance pulled up to the doors, lights and sirens blaring. Abby threw the butt on the ground and stomped it out. Kerry and Malik met her as they all worked to pull their next patient from the back of the ambulance. Turning back one last time to watch John leave, she thought that maybe she should call and check up on him later.
~~~~~~~~
It had been a really long time since John had felt such a deep need to attend a meeting, specifically a NA meeting for that matter. He wasn't sure what exactly had triggered this fierce desire to use and that had really scared him. In the past he had always known. He knew that he had been under a lot of stress lately, but he felt that he was managing it quite well. He talked frequently to Dave, Susan and Abby about everything that was going on so he didn't feel that he was keeping it all inside.
Tonight had been no exception. As soon as he arrived home he talked to Dave and they spend some time together in the billiard room. John even had Corrine serve them dinner in there as his mother had elected to stay at the hospital. They didn't have much time before Dave had to leave for work. He was working a staggering double that day, just like at County, Dave's employer was almost always short-staffed. They really needed that time together.
Copyright Footer', 'This site is not affiliated in any way with "ER", its writers or production company, or NBC, and makes no profit from the show. The ERROS skin is by Brihana. The script is eFiction version 3.4.2© Tammy Keefer, http://efiction.org\r\n